Have You Lost Your Inner Risk Taker?
Another day, another blog!
I woke up today feeling a bit bothered, feeling incomplete. Like I've lost who I once was when life made me the happiest; when one risk was nothing more but another decision that had to be made to push me forward in life. And so I laid in my bed just thinking about all of the things that have been happening in my life lately: the choices I've made, the circumstances I've been given, the choices others have made that I in turn had to deal with. It made me realize that I’ve gotten away from being a healthy risk taker. I've fallen away from allowing life to do what life is suppose to do rather than me force it to do something it wasn't intended to do. Strangely enough the words FEAR, SCARED, and TERRIFIED started to flood my mind. I began asking myself when did I become so afraid to take a chance on something important, specifically myself?! I then started to think about children. How children have such a great and wild imagination that for the most part, even as little babies and toddlers, cause them to function in this life without fear. How free they live their life, how curious and adventurous they tend to be. In that moment it was clear: fear was not something that any of us were born with. It’s something, as human beings, we’ve learned as we grew older. The people around us taught us how to be afraid and what to be afraid of until we were able as tweens, teens, and adults to take that fear and place it in specific areas of our own lives. We were taught to fear risk and chance and the uknown.
So as I fluffed my pillows, rolled over on my back and added yet another layer from my barrage of blankets and comforters I asked myself:
“When did I become too scared to take risks that may have moved me forward in life?”
Here’s what I’ve come up with…and still working on lol. When my life became a jumble of madness between losing a downtown loft, losing a secure job, losing a relationship, losing friends and family, and simply just losing my mind, my risk taker button somehow got turned off! I allowed for so many people to feed into me that all of the loss I had (and at the time still was) enduring was due to my lack of preparation, my lack of planning, my lack of know how; quite frankly I feel like they were saying it was all my fault because I had a lack of ME!
And the truth is they were partially right. I WAS lacking a part of myself. The part of me that wasn’t afraid to venture into the unknown, to pick up and go without a moment’s notice JUST to see what could, would, or even should happen! The adventurer in me had somehow been put into a dungeon a million miles below the earth with a sign on the door that said “Never Let Out, People Will Not Understand.” I had lost that part of my personality that couldn't care less about what people said, thought, or agreed with and instead walked bodly and consciously into a level of life I knew nothing about; to test my ability to sink or swim. Enjoying every minute of the journey along the way. I had lost my fire and essentially killed a very important part of myself.
One of the joys about being a kid is that our imaginations take us any and everywhere but as an adult our imaginations KEEP us from going any and everywhere. Isn’t part of the magic of life being able to NOT KNOW what’s going to happen? To feel the rush of hope and adrenaline that comes from allowing life to just take you on a ride? I want to be able to not just exist but to LIVE the only life I have to live. I’m discovering that taking a risk doesn’t have to mean detriment for my livelihood. It could actually be healthy! Healthy risks help keep us refreshed and renewed, helps us to find something new to work toward. Taking a chance on something sometimes can be the thing you need to spice up your life and take it out of the mundane, unenthusiastic cycle it might be in.
I know there are millions of people who think that this is a sentiment for a fool. People who think that you should ALWAYS have a plan, you should ALWAYS know your next move and in certain situations I completely understand the importance and need for planning and being prepared; however, you have to know when to take your plan and throw it out of the window (or at least put it in a file for later) in order to enjoy life and what it has to offer you. There’s not ONE successful business that got to where it is without knowing when to take a healthy risk. Ask anyone in entertainment whose life is BUILT on risk: The risk of whether or not they’re going to get that part or get that record deal or even get that call back.
When did we become SO afraid to enjoy life’s ride? Well I for one am NOT going to pass this ride up! It’s the only one I’ve been offered and I intend to milk it for all it’s worth. I don’t have my life all figured out, hell some days I don’t have the next hour figured out, but I’m learning little by little that sometimes I don’t have to! Maybe I just need to take a chance on something new and see where it takes me.
**Photo courtesty of www.housecleanersperthwa.com.au